I remember as a teenager accepting that I already felt 40 and would eventually grow into myself. I have caught up with myself in some ways. It's nice to imagine what I can do next.
It's hard working not working hard.
I don't know about luck. It's like coincidences, impossible to know if it's real or not, more something that we choose to believe, or not. I don't subscribed to most superstitions, including unlucky 13. I saw it as more of a coincidence this morning when, already feeling low, I got another job rejection and then … Continue reading Post 413 – Lucky 13
'You'll never believe it' my husband says in a resigned way on the other end of the phone. We're talking about all the coincidences happening around us at the moment when he gets a text from my sister telling him she's just had the exact same kind of never before heard of, freaky, what are … Continue reading Post 412 -You’ll never believe it
I haven't posted for a while but I've still been writing. Writing a new CV. Writing job application cover letters. Writing responses to Key Selection Criteria. I'm in that grey area where I've gotten comfortable writing an applications every day but when I got a call from a recruiter, instead of a rejection, I was … Continue reading Post 411 – It’s been a while
Before I was rejected, my plan was to accept rejection if that was the outcome, and hold off any other plans to leave the company or study until the new year. They way I was rejected certainly solidified my passion for HR, motivating me to study and actively look for other roles.
But the constant rejection is unpleasant. Sitting with that unpleasant feeling is difficult and I usually avoid it by making myself very busy, binge eating or drinking, then getting indignant and making a new more complicated plan to 'show them'.
There are some things that have passed or fallen out of fashion that I still like and wish were more widespread. There are some things that exist today that I love and there are things that are being projected for the future that fill me with wonder and others that fill me with dread.
It hurts to be rejected. It hurts to be rejected and to have to face that rejection in the presence of others again and again.
What if I dug more in the why of the goal or the thing that was fun to dream up but wont' get finished? What if that gives me alternate ways to achieve the why and 'finish' that instead.